Everything I Ever Needed to Know About Business I Learned from The Eagles in Hotel California
Without considering the lyrics of “Hotel California,” the melody itself is foreboding. Don Henley and his band mates seem to be warning us of something we can’t exactly identify, but of which we feel the vibrations in our soul.
While the Eagles have alluded to different meanings behind “Hotel California,” including a presentation of John Fowles’ The Magus and a commentary on sociopolitical trends, we chose to extrapolate all of the business, marketing, and life lessons we learned from this foreboding classic. Specifically, we feel that the ballad accompanies us to that special moment that makes or breaks business people everywhere.
On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
The first endeavor into business can be horrifyingly lonely. All the friends in the world are not enough to protect from the glow of a warm screen when faced with the cold reality of financial forecasts or personal bank account balances.
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night.
Even for the truest entrepreneurial spirit, the days get long, the nights get lonely, and bones get weary. Colitas is Spanish for “little tails” which is a slang term for cannabis. A warm, safe light, the smell of colitas, and the promise of a long night’s sleep lull weary-souls to an elusive comfort.
There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
That rest for the businessman’s weary soul can come in the form of a sweet salesman’s promise, a shiny object, or a “savior” of a new partner or employee to take away all the pain.
And I was thinking to myself
‘This could be heaven or this could be Hell’
The entrepreneur’s brain knows that there is no magic answer. There is no “silver bullet” or dream solution to all problems. But the entrepreneur’s tired heart is drawn to the easy answer like a moth to the flame… of a candle…
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say
This mysterious silver-bullet solution veiled as a woman guides her prey’s business model, success, and finances to her lair.
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year (any time of year) you can find it here
Perhaps the echoes of previous entrepreneurial victims hum their lullaby, encouraging someone to be caught in the web with them. After all, it does get lonely.
Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes bends
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget
Our silver bullet’s promises begin to look a bit thin, once it’s already too late to back out. The entrepreneur sees signs and starts to question his footing, his direction. “Perhaps I shouldn’t have signed an 18-month contract,” or “maybe this guy wasn’t everything everyone said he was,” dance through the businessman’s head as his silver-bullet savior shows traces of its true form in the right light. Yet, the businessman is reassured by those that surround the magic solution. Whether they are wallowing in their own misery or just haven’t pulled the wool off yet…
So I called up the Captain,
‘Please bring me my wine’
He said, ‘we haven’t had that spirit here since nineteen sixty-nine’
Then, when our poor, weary business person calls his new solution to reality and hopes to reap his rest and reward… he is denied because none of it was real in the first place.
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say…
Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place (such a lovely place)
Such a lovely face.
They livin’ it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise (what a nice surprise), bring your alibis
In the slight tweak of the chorus, the Eagles interlace “bring your alibis,” which, at this point for the businessman, is the warning herald of the grand unveiling. In real life, this may be when a clue is found indicating that a new business partner is draining profits, a new solution is beginning to look half-baked and doesn’t fit, or any other shiny object that fits the bill at the time.
Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said, ‘we are all just prisoners here, of our own device’
It has been unveiled. The weary entrepreneur has seen the thin veneer pulled off his silver bullet solution and has found nothing but tackiness, cheap substitutes, and horror behind it.
And in the master’s chambers,
They gathered for the feast
They stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can’t kill the beast
Now, not only does the entrepreneur have the original problems, but they have been compounded to nightmarish levels and the future is more uncertain and wavering than ever.
Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before
Unfortunately, that optimism never comes back. The blind faith and untainted outlook on business ventures is stolen and never comes for the entrepreneur. Once he survives and navigates the tumultuous waters, he only wishes for the time before the silver bullet came along, if for nothing more than the more positive outlook…
‘Relax’ said the night man,
‘We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
But you can never leave!’
The business man is on this journey now and he’s burned and jaded. This is that critical moment, the one that will determine the rest of his life and there is no going back. The decision at that point, when the going is tough and business is bad, is the only real indicator if one is an entrepreneur or destined for other things. But he certainly can’t go back.
